Looking back over my life, I realize I hadn’t ever really thought much about being a mom. I wanted to marry, but never really brought children into the picture in my imagination! You might say … my view of the future lacked some perspective. Perspective is a word with a Latin root which means one looks through a circumstance to see something—to perceive something. When we say a person has perspective, it means they are looking at the world from a proper perspective, able to understand life and the various aspects of every situation. When I speak with moms I realize most of us come into motherhood lacking perspective. Perspective would have helped us to know that all children would need lots of work, all marriages would be unions between two sinful people needing God’s grace, that all lives would require a lot of faith and longsuffering and grace.
To me, faith gives me the perspective of seeing life as a long-term journey. Proverbs 31 gives us a beautiful picture of what a woman with perspective can be:
An excellent wife, who can find?
For her worth is far above jewels.
The heart of her husband trusts in her,And he will have no lack of gain.She does him good and not evilAll the days of her life.She looks for wool and flaxAnd works with her hands in delight.She is like merchant ships;She brings her food from afar…She girds herself with strengthAnd makes her arms strong.She senses that her gain is good;Her lamp does not go out at night. …She extends her hand to the poor,And she stretches out her hands to the needy.She is not afraid of the snow for her household,For all her household are clothed with scarlet. …Strength and dignity are her clothing,
And she smiles at the future.
She opens her mouth in wisdom,And the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.She looks well to the ways of her household,And does not eat the bread of idleness.Her children rise up and bless her;Her husband also, and he praises her, saying:“Many daughters have done nobly,But you excel them all.”– Proverbs 31:10-31
This is God’s design for a woman with perspective! Over many years I’ve developed such admiration for Clay, my husband. We are very different and both have our strengths and weaknesses and I know he appreciates what I am able to bring to our home as a woman who walks with God.
When my children were young, I used to feel insecure and guilty, sometimes. I could feel like a victim when the kids made messes or when someone was very ill and it seemed to go on forever—too often, I found myself reacting rather than pulling up my sleeves and determining to have a good attitude and trust, to decide what my behavior would be even before the tough things happened.
The truth is, even if you sometimes are tempted to feel like a victim, God has given you great strength and you are truly able to accomplish much more than you think you can. Jesus is praying for you. The Spirit is filling you. You can live in the grace of God! In order to do that, we have to study His Word.
I taught my children Psalm 1 when they were very young. It’s one of our family favorites, and I especially appreciate verse 1:
How blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked,Nor stand in the path of sinners,Nor sit in the seat of scoffers!- Psalm 1:1
In other words, blessed is the man who does not put him (or her!) -self in front of unwise people to receive counsel. What voices are we listening to? It goes on to tell us, don’t stand in the path of wickedness or evil—don’t tolerate those who walk that way. Don’t just overlook it or turn a blind eye and continue to spend time with those who are looking for life and wisdom outside and away from God’s ways.
It also warns us not to sit in the seat of scoffers— those who judge and criticize; those who are cynical or display a denigrating attitude and caustic voice toward others. That attitude does not please God, and we are told not to spend much time there, either, if we desire to develop a godly perspective.
Instead, we walk in the light of Christ. We can ask Him to enlighten us, to give us His wisdom through Proverbs and the parables, and through the teachings of Jesus. How does a woman gain perspective and confidence, and walk with dignity—all the things in Proverbs 31? She walks with God and trusts in His leading in her life, and rejects the voice of the world.
Your pathway is a journey from immaturity toward strength, so you can be a woman who builds her house and extends her influence, who learns to teach the righteousness of God.
What’s your perspective? Are you a victim of circumstances? Or are you aware that God is with you and helping you as you move through those things happening in your life to become more patient and faithful and strong, and model those things for your children?
0 Responses
Thank you Sally for these beautiful words! It’s so easy to feel like a victim and forget that God is with us and makes us able to handle all situations. I want to be a woman that walks with God, TRUSTS His leading, and rejects the voice of the world! Trusting can be hard and asking for guidance and council from people that are not living a Godly life can be so easy. I’ve made it a personal challenge to turn to the Bible and prayer first in all situations instead of turning to others to complain or gossip or feel sorry for myself. Thank you to all the LGG leaders and I can’t wait for the next study!
Mondee~LGG Encourager
In your lesson today, you said, “In other words, blessed is the man who does not put him (or her!) -self in front of unwise people to receive counsel. What voices are we listening to? It goes on to tell us, don’t stand in the path of wickedness or evil—don’t tolerate those who walk that way. Don’t just overlook it or turn a blind eye and continue to spend time with those who are looking for life and wisdom outside and away from God’s ways. ” I have a question about this.
If I have a family member, a close family member, that is in my life every day but their relationship with God is strained (my word, they might put it quite differently). But they are obviously not a wise person for me to be around, how do I separate myself from someone who is in my life so closely, so often? I know that God is trying to change this because I was just praying about this and here this lesson is today. I’m just not sure how to change such a close relationship.
Good morning Momof! Family can be a challenge. I don’t know your situation, but I do know you can pray for your family member, and you can let them see the light of Jesus in you! Let jesus shine through your words and actions and we can pray that they see the love that can be received by knowing God. Your family will be in my prayers!
Mondee~LGG Encourager
God is always so consistent…just this morning on my ride to work, I was thinking about how my husband and I are trying to get pregnant and what kind of example would I be to my children as I currently am. For the past 8 years or so I have been struggling with laziness, overeating, and a general frumpy attitude…You words today, Sally, just lined up so beautifully with all that I was thinking about. Thank you for letting the Holy Spirit guide your words! Particularly:
“The truth is, even if you sometimes are tempted to feel like a victim, God has given you great strength and you are truly able to accomplish much more than you think you can. Jesus is praying for you. The Spirit is filling you. You can live in the grace of God! In order to do that, we have to study His Word.”
It’s time for me to step up…to get up…to get dedicated to the task that is before me so that my husband and I are healthy and good examples for our future children!
Thank you for sharing your words and your prayer! I agree with you about the way beauty is portrayed! I have a daughter and I want her to know that beauty is from the inside. As women I think we all struggle some with worrying about our outside looks. I try to remind myself and others that if we looked at ourselves through the eyes of Jesus we would see ourselves as flawless.
Mondee~LGG Encourager
Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised. Proverbs 31:30
The root word of charm here is chen (pronounced khan) and means grace or favour. Perceived favor in someone else’s life can give a false impression that all is well. And beauty, well we all know outer beauty doesn’t last forever. But when I am in the presence of a woman who is following Jesus, I can see her heart. This beauty emanates from deep within, she radiates beauty that is enhanced by age, not diminished with time. And this is the kind of beauty that brings inner peace. It dispels the struggle and agony to be beautiful on the outside. Our souls are made more visible when we are intimately following God. And this is the beauty I desire to possess.
I fall prey to the world’s captivating message of what beauty looks like every day. Images and perceived perfection invade my sight everywhere I turn. I find myself not even noticing the shift of envy, until I am deeply dissatisfied and frustrated when I see myself in the mirror. I never measure up when my eyes are filtered through what I have been programmed to believe is beautiful. And so I come back to the Creator of true beauty every morning, I kneel before His throne and He crowns me with the eternal truth that I am far more precious than rubies or gold. His presence shifts my heart to the truth and I rise more lovely by His standards.
Lord, I am grateful for your presence in my life. My eyes see more clearly when I stay close to You. Your Kingdom is my home and I know all things will be made new. All things will be returned to the original glory and the way You meant them to be. Strengthen me each day as I put Your truth in front of all that I see. Only the cross of Jesus between me and the rest of the world. Until you call me home, I will seek Your wisdom. May my life be the beautiful reflection of Your love and may Your grace flow from my hands to the rest of the world. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Thank you for sharing your words and your prayer! I agree with you about the way beauty is portrayed! I have a daughter and I want her to know that beauty is from the inside. As women I think we all struggle some with worrying about our outside looks. I try to remind myself and others that if we looked at ourselves through the eyes of Jesus we would see ourselves as flawless.
Mondee~LGG Encourager
Thank you for such a beautiful post Sally. I have learned so much from studying Proverbs. It was really one of my favorite studies. I look forward to the next study. Off to Amazon I go. God bless you all.
Shannan, thank you! Thank you for studying along with us, thank you for being willing to study with us again. With the next study, may all who join in on the next study come to know our Savior is the answer to brokenness.