With tears streaming down her face one of my daughters ran into my bathroom one morning as I was getting ready. Burying her head into my stomach she cried, “Mommy, make her stop! ‘So and so’ is not saying kind words! She called me a name and it hurt my feelings. I’m not a _______. She is lying!”
Speaking words of love and kindness is something I intentionally work on with my three daughters. In a world that tells women to “speak it like it is” to make your voice heard – even if it is screaming and filled with anger and hate – just speak your “truth” for the world to hear. I’m desperately trying to teach my daughters otherwise.
Yes, God has blessed each of us with a voice, and it is important we feel the freedom to share what God has laid on our hearts. But as Christian women, we also have a responsibility in how we use our voice and our freedom. We need to do so in a God-honoring way.
Daily I remind my girls we all have a choice: we can either build others up or tear them down based on the words we choose. I want my girls to learn the power of their words and how they can use them to either bring life – by encouraging others and speaking love into their lives – or they can bring death by their criticism and judgment. I want my girls to learn to the importance of building others up through their words.
I also want them to learn that just because someone says something about you, doesn’t make it true. We live in a world filled with lies, and we have to teach our children, and ourselves, to listen to the Voice of truth rather than the lies of the world.
We see this same struggle with Adam and Eve. Like us, they had a choice: believe God is good and had their best in mind, or believe the lie that God was withholding something good from them. And just like Satan, he twisted the truth and lied to Eve, making her think God was withholding something good from her. Faced with the decision to obey God or listen to the lies of the deceiver, Eve chooses to gratify her desire for wisdom instead of living her life by faith and obeying God.
“When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining WISDOM, she took some and ate it.” – Genesis 3:6
And as daughters of Eve, we make the same decision.
We listen to what the world says about us instead of going to God’s Word and reading what He says. We allow the world to speak into our hearts and minds and tell us our worth.
When Eve felt as though she was lacking, she allowed Satan to tempt her – not only through her eyes and hands – but in her desire to improve herself. She felt she needed more wisdom.
And how many times have I found myself in Eve’s shoes? How many times have I felt I’m not enough? How many times have I desired more wisdom in my life but turned to the lies of the world instead of the Word of Truth? For me, it’s a daily struggle.
At the heart of any lie is the belief that God doesn’t know what’s best. We think that our wisdom is better than His.
“You will not surely die, ” the serpent said to the woman. “For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” – Genesis 3:4-5
And that lie brought death. Not just for Adam and Eve, but for everyone.
But because of God’s great love for us, He came and rescued us from all the lies we have believed and all of the lies we have spoken to ourselves and to others. He laid His life down for us each of us, shattering the ultimate lie that God doesn’t love us.
Like Adam and Eve, we have a choice. Are we going to believe God’s truth or Satan’s lies?
When we choose to walk in God’s wisdom, we choose to live our lives in God’s truth.
Friends, may we be women who delight in God’s truth and stop believing the lies spoken to us in this world. May we be women who know God’s truth and no longer listen to the lies of our enemy. God loves us, is for us, and is the Giver of the wisdom we seek. May we be women who choose to live our lives by faith in our Lord Jesus Christ.
We are beautiful because He created us.
We are loved because He loves us.
We are whole because He fills our gaps.
The world’s lies imprison us, but thankfully we have a choice: we don’t have to listen to the world. We can choose to listen to the Voice of Truth!
Let’s dig into God’s truth, because His truth sets us free…
Let’s Talk: What lies are you believing right now in your life?
Love God Greatly!
Grab our Walking in Wisdom journals on Amazon and dig into God’s Word with us!

I was attacked, verbally, last night – and not for the first time. I cried myself to sleep, then woke up, and after lying in the dark, hoping sleep would come again, I turned on my laptop, and checked email, and praise God, read the subject line “When You Believe The Lies Instead Of The Truth”. I felt, overwhelmingly, that God was speaking to me, because I’d been told how hateful I am, how ugly I am, how worthless I am, along with all my actions. I cried because I’m honestly not hateful, I’m very loving, and I don’t want to believe that I’m ugly – although I feel ugly, and that’s the easiest lie to believe – and I try so hard not to be worthless, but nothing I ever do is good enough for my attacker. My retreat during these emotional beatings, is into my past. Into my life before the two precious people who raised me were both dead. My great uncle and great aunt, who died in 1982 and 1991, respectively. I cry and remember how much they loved me, and how good they both were, and if they loved me, such good, godly people, how could anything else be true? But then I read your message. Your beautiful God-given message, and I thought “even more so, how can any of what he says be true, if the Creator of the universe loves me so much? The God of all creation, loves me?”. It’s now 4 am and I wanted to answer your question “What lies are you believing right now in your life?” and thank you for your faith, and for allowing yourself to be used in such a wonderful way, by God, to minister to women like me. God spoke directly to me this very early morning, and He did that through your heart and this ministry. Thank you.
Stephani, reading your words this morning filled my eyes with tears. I have at times felt the same and as I read your words, I know very important women in my life that are feeling similar. Stephani, I hope you find truth in his word because I’m telling you that you are loved, your are specially made by our God and you are beautiful! Father I pray that you fill all the gaps in Stephani’s heart with your truth, your love. Let her feel your loving arms wrap around her in protection when she is being tore down with lies. Father open her heart and eyes to the truth that you who made our earth and all things beautiful, made her with the same grandeur! In your name I pray, amen. Prayers and Hugs to you!
Mondee- LGG ENCOURAGER
Let your light shine sweet Stephani! You are the daughter of the King of the Universe, and you are loved with an everlasting love!!
Stephani,
Thank you so much for being brave and sharing your story. God is definitely speaking to you and guiding you through this difficult journey! When I read your story, I was taken back to a time in my life where I also experienced severe emotional abuse. I pray that God surrounds you with His love and people who build you up. After my grandmother and parents died, I also felt alone. But God will put people in our lives who support and minister to us. He did that for you today with this message! Listen to His truth and wisdom. God Bless You???
Dear Stephani, Oh how your words hurt my heart! I too, lived with that same emotional abuse for several years. I was so emotionally beaten down that I truly thought I was the ugliest, most worthless, most disgusting person that walked the face of this earth! My emotional abuser turned into a physical abuser as well, and that is when I was able to escape him and receive the help I so desperately needed! And that is when I found the love of God, and started healing and learning that I am His beautiful daughter, and I am loved! I pray that you will find the help you need! Stephani, you are so loved and treasured! You are His, and He doesn’t want you to live in these conditions. I am praying for you sweet sister! May God bless you and be with you!
Praying for you Stephani, that you will see the Truth of how loved and valuable you are., toyour Savior and to your sisters here
Praying for you sweet Sephani, that you will see the Truth of how loved and valuable you are., to our Savior and to your sisters here.
Stephani, thank you for sharing. First I want to tell you, you are a child of God and God doesn’t make mistakes! God made you so you are FAR from worthless!! Why is it as women we are so quick to believe what others say even if we know we are not that way! I too have been in your shoes and been the recipant I verbal attacks from people close to me, even my own parents used Bible verses against me to tell me how horrible I am. It takes turning to God in those times and remembering that God loves you sin and all. With God we can be all he has made us to be. Keep your head held high today and don’t give into lies, turn to God and hear his voice of truth about who you are in him!!
Stephani,
Please know that you are worth so much more than this. I’ve been exactly where you are today. Countless nights crying myself to sleep because I believed the lies that beaten into my mind. Please know that you are not the problem, it took me a long time to realize this. I’m praying for you and my Nanny would say pray for those who hurt you, they need it most. Pray for them, pray that God softens their hearts helps them not to be so bitter. I pray this is helpful. Your story used to be mine and Jesus was my only escape… Always pray and never give up (Luke 18:1)!
Yvonne
Thank you all so very much for your sweet replies! Thank you for the advice to pray for him, my abuser. I used to pray for him almost constantly, and it finally got to the point where I’d been hurt so many times, I couldn’t bring myself to lift him up anymore. I know I’ve been wrong in that. He’s an alcoholic, and when he’s sober, he’s such a lovely and precious person, but when he’s been drinking, it’s literally like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. It’s actually more painful due to these extremes in temperament, because my heart still loves him so much, the sober man, that when the alcohol impaired man abuses me, it’s a sickening heart breaking pain. If he were mean all of the time, I think it might be easier, although I think that sounds strange. I vow to begin praying for him again, because I know he’s lost in his disease, and he’s worth so much more than the way we’ve been living. Thank you again, so so so very much for your replies. I am so thankful for you all.
Stephani,
If you are not already getting counseling from a pastor or counselor, please PLEASE get help. I too was a victim of this kind of abuse for several years. It is called domestic violence, and it does not have to be physical to be considered domestic violence. If you don’t know where to get counseling or help, please google to find a domestic violence or domestic abuse center, in your town and call them. From my own experience, I know that when you are in the midst of this kind of cyclic emotional abuse, it is so hard to recognize and understand what is really happening or what to do to protect yourself. I will pray for you, sweet sister, but please realize that you are in a dangerous situation and I hope and pray that you will seek counseling. Big, big hug to you.
Oh sweet lady! That used to be a regular way of life for me. There was hardly a day that went by that I wasn’t screamed at or beaten up or some other violence. When we started to go to church, I thought things would get better but, sadly, it just got worse. I was then told I was a demon or the devil and didn’t deserve to live.
Now, we ended up divorced because I was afraid for my life. I never believed divorce was the answer but eventually it was just the last option.
Please know that God, the Creator, the same One who created all of nature’s beauty, created YOU! He put amazing thought into you. He made you to be amazing and beautiful and sweet and smart and encouraging. He did NOT make you to be abused or to be a doormat.
If things get really bad or you are ever scared for yourself or children if you have them, I would encourage you to find a safe place to go and make a counseling a priority before you even think of going home.
This group of ladies here at LGG are truly blessed by God. He has spoken to me in NUMEROUS ways in just these first 2 weeks of study. Please continue in this study and make a promise to yourself that you will work on it daily no matter what else is going on. You have so many sisters in Christ who will have you in their prayers, you are loved! And you are amazing!
God bless you Stephani!! I’m praying for you. I also pray for your verbal abuser that God would touch his heart and open his eyes to see you as God sees you and all of us. I pray that He turns to Goder and surrenders his heart to him as well.
[email protected]
I always get trapped into the lies of feeling worthless, needing to justify myself, and feeling unloved. A few years ago, God dealt with me hardcore on those issues. He reminded me that’s he is ALWAYS there I just have to look for him sometimes. At the end of the day the ONLY one I have to justify myself to is God. If he’s happy with me that’s all that matters. And HE loves me. The most holy, wonderful, AMAZING God, Creator of the universe loves little ME!! What more to I really need??? Yes, I still struggle, but I try to remember these promises to pull through the low moments.
How beautiful Jennifer that you know God is always with you. That is so key to knowing the temptation we face is nothing we can’t handle without his love and wisdom. He promises us a way out of our struggles and He will pull us through them. Praise God for His amazing love ?
What a beautiful testimony, Jennifer! When we realize that the God of the universe chose to create us, loves us and has wonderful plans for our lives, everything really falls into place. Know that you are loved and the daughter of the one true King!
That I am not a good mother for my children and that I was never meant to have any (I am currently pregnant with blessing number four). My words hurt them on a daily basis and my guilt wrecks me for losing my patience with them.
Amen dear friend. I struggle here, too. God has blessed us with number two after seven years of trying and three losses. I feel guilty every time I get angry and lose my patience. But, I take it back to the Lord, ask my daughter to forgive me, and start again. And the next day I repeat this pattern. I understand completely where you are coming from. Just try and remember that God is for us, and the guilt we feel is not from Him. Instead, use that as a motivation to lay it at the Lord’s feet. Many prayers for you Jenn 🙂
Jenn, God loves you and is walking with you through this season. Parenting is not for cowards! Remember His mercies are new every morning…. We are going to mess up because we are human, but we can ask for forgiveness and start over again fresh each day with the Spirit’s help.
Blessings,
Lyli
Parenting is hard, and our good Lord knows we struggle. Be strong, He blessed you with children and will give you the patience and love you need, just pray. Lean hard on him everyday and just know his grace and mercies cover you! Hugs to you!
Mondee-LGG ENCOURAGER
Jenn, I have 3 grown children, and pretty much the entire time I was raising them, I struggled with the feelings you’ve mentioned in your post. I felt that I was too stressed, too quick to snap, too distracted – just not a good mom. At the end of the day, now that they are 25, 20, and 19 – they all tell me how much they love me, and that they couldn’t have asked for, or wanted, a better mom. They don’t even remember the things that stood out so obviously to me! The things that I passed judgment on myself for – they say “haha, mom!If you did snap at me, I’m sure I deserved it” and things of that nature. Please try to be gentle with yourself. Your children will remember the good things, and not the bad. I’m almost 100% certain. I will keep you in my prayers!
I had to quit a job about three weeks ago because of a hostile environment. I tried my best to practice my faith in GOD to make the best of my situation by being kind and a team player to others, but no matter what I did my co-workers still find fault in me. This made me feel like I was worthless and was not appreciated for my hard work. I being to build anger and resentment against my fellow co-workers and all it did was make me become what they were. My body and mind were burned out by negative energy and no spiritual surroundings. I could not even pray to my FATHER for help, so I did what I knew I needed to do. Without saying a word I just walk out one day and said LORD I know you would not place me in a place like this. I know I should not have walked out, but I felt like my world was just crumbling down. I needed the money, but I needed my mind to be able to focus on what GOD desires were for me. My supervisor was called and asked by a fellow co-worker what happen to me, and she told them that I was not good at my job and should not be able to practice my profession. I was hurt and discussed with what she said about me, but I am just like Eve I had to make a decision, and I choose the right decision by leaving. Now today I have started back to college, studying the word of GOD to keep my healthy in mind and spirit. I know people will lie to you, and lie about you, but my father who leaves in heaven see’s all things. I do not need to be heard with angry and resentment because by wisdom in GOD’s word I will have the victory because GOD will lead me to a place of peace and contentment.
I am sorry sorry to hear of your troubles, Kimbly. I pray for God’s peace that passes all understanding to be with you as you begin a new chapter in your life. I also pray for those who hurt you, that they will see the harm their actions and words have caused, and God will soften their hearts. Continue in His word and God Bless You!
Thank you for your prayers. I will walk in God’s words through my journey and a new place in GOD. Thank you, LLG for encouraging women to walk in faith. Without faith, there is no hope.
Kimbly, I am so sorry to hear that you have been through such a difficult season. Praying for God to help you to heal as you press in to Him and study His Word. God’s desire is for you to have peace of mind and spirit.
Blessings,
Lyli
For months my husband has been having a affair. I know because the woman wrote it on paper.I found it. We moved to an different state to start a fresh. But he has her to come to visit so they can sleep together. The sad part is they both lie that they don’t. She drives different cars so I want see her. But each time God has allowed us to pass each. He is and Minister of the gospel. I pray God says stand still. He tells me God doesn’t tell me he is cheating. But God has. I know God. I have said you can’t serve God and satan.
Oh Sweet friend. This is the most difficult position. My prayers are with you as you seek His guidance and understanding. Lord, be with this woman, and hold her close and let her know you are always there. In Jesus’ name.
So i had a missed opportunity to speak life and now I’m kicking myself. I have a 11 year old stepson and our relationship is good but very different from my biological children. His dad is pretty sick right now with bronchitis and couldn’t take him to drum practice. My stepsons mother lives on the other side of the country and heir relationship is strained and all he’s really ever known is his dad and then me (for 5 years). Well he starts crying that his dad can’t take him to drums and I know he’s worried about his dad. I try to talk to him and he snaps at me, I don’t want to talk. Like he’s done several times before. Instead of pausing and letting him be I pushed and got upset. I felt it was necessary for me to reassure him but what I probably should have done is waited on him to open up. It frustrates me that he closes in and thinks the worst anytime something happens. He doesn’t have to feel that way! Also I know he feels it’s his fault his dad is sick because he had the big first. I just wanted to talk and reassure him but I should have stopped and thought about what he needed/wanted. Then I felt like he was disrespectful for not wanting to talk and snapping at me. How do we stop in the heated moments and wait on the Lord to create the moment? As I sit here outside his lesson I feel horrible that I missed an opportunity to speak life and caused a rift in our relationship.
Oh Jennifer, my heart aches for you. I don’t have a step son, but I have a 12 year old niece who tests me so much. I have to pray daily to be patient and understanding and honestly most times I’m not. Back talk and attitude are my two serious pet peeves in kids and she has them in abundance. I personally try and apologize for snapping at her, but I pray for her and me before doing this. It’s hard. They are at such a delicate age and she is completely opposite of my son. So, I empathize with you. I’m praying for you. I’m praying for your relationship to grow.
Thank you!! I did pray and apologized last night after his lesson. It’s a daily struggle wanting so badly to have the same relationship with him as I have with my own kids but I know it can’t be the same. It’s difficult but I love him dearly. Thanks again!
Reading that was truly eye opening for me. I believe to many lies such as; i am not good enough, i am a failure, i am not a good mom or daughter, i am not who I was sipposed to be and etc. The truth is; yes, I am far from perfect, i make several mistakes a day and am way to hard on myself. At the end of rhe day I always try to do the right thing and have great intentions along with a huge heart that wants to save everyone. My main problem is that i have not spent any time with God. I realize that now. I need to set some time each day and talk to him, read hos word and pray to him. Often tho I get discouraged beacause i feel i do not come up with good enough prayers for Him, especially after prayers I have read by other people. One of my goals is to learn to pray to Hom better and any help would be greatly appreciated! Lol
Oh Kelly, you are speaking right to my heart! I think as women we all have those moments of feeling “less than”…less than a good mom, less than a good wife, less than a good person even! 🙂 But, that’s where God comes in, just like you said…we need to spend time with God, with the ONE who loves us no matter our shortcomings because only He can help us see past them!
Ephesians 2:8-10 tells us: For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God—NOT BY WORKS, so that no one can boast. For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.
Praise God that it isn’t from anything that we have or have not done that we are saved!
As far as your concern about your prayers, remember that God created you to be you…One of the greatest lessons I learned about prayer was that God wants to talk with me, not because of what I say or how I say it, but because He loves me. So, pray to Him as you would talk to Him, that’s really what it’s all about. The more often you pray, the easier it will seem because it will start to feel like you are just talking with an old friend – God being the GREATEST FRIEND of all!
Father, thank You so much for Kelly! Thank You for giving her the strength to bear her heart and reach out to You. Thank You for helping to guide her as she steps out in faith to talk with You on a regular basis. Thank You for continuing to walk beside her as she yearns to walk closer to You. In Jesus’ name, amen!
Reading that was truly eye opening for me. I believe to many lies such as; i am not good enough, i am a failure, i am not a good mom or daughter, i am not who I was sipposed to be and etc. The truth is; yes, I am far from perfect, i make several mistakes a day and am way to hard on myself. At the end of rhe day I always try to do the right thing and have great intentions along with a huge heart that wants to save everyone. My main problem is that i have not spent any time with God. I realize that now. I need to set some time each day and talk to him, read hos word and pray to him. Often tho I get discouraged beacause i feel i do not come up with good enough prayers for Him, especially after prayers I have read by other people. One of my goals is to learn to pray to Hom better and any help would be greatly appreciated! Lol
Kelly, remember we are perfectly imperfect. Our imperfections help us to grow and they are how God uses us to witness to others. If everyone was perfect then how would be able to witness and tell of God’s amazing forgiveness and grace? We were teaching the youth last night about prayer and prayer isn’t supposed to be something elaborate…it is you talking to God and so therefor it should be what you feel. Just like you are talking to your friends.
This is great especially for a time such as now. I am dealing with a situation where I am being lied on by people I held dear to my heart. It is a hurting feeling but I refuse to let it get me down. I am in transition to fulfilling the things of God and refuse to allow anything to take me off course this time. I was on who let the opinions of others hold me back and had me thinking I was no use to the Kingdom only because I didn’t quote scriptures all the time nor did I rehearsed the Church antics. But thank God for deliverance from people’s opinions. Even in my current situation I approached the accusers but they are in hiding so I have decided to give it to God and let Him do the rest. In the mean time I am declaring who God says I am as well as believing it because if you are not careful you would fall back to believing the lies of what others say you are.
Sweet Tasha, it is so encouraging to hear you are continuing to declare who God says you are as others around you are allowing negativity and evil to overpower their words and actions. God, I ask that you would continue to strengthen Tasha as she walks this path you have brought her to. Send her encouragement and separate her from the lies and deceit so she is fully able to focus on the path You are leading her down. In Jesus’ name, amen.
Reading I felt as though this is me at this very moment. No one is telling me hurtful things, just myself. I over analyze everything I do, say, or think. I am making myself anxious about my marriage and feel as though Satan is trying to wedge himself between my husband and I. I believe the lies my mind is making up and feel hopeless. I have prayed and prayed about this but am feeling lost.
Don’t worry. God will lead you into all truth. Ask him to open your eyes to the truth and to understand who he really is. I promise, he will come through. It’s a spiritual battle.
That my illness (lupus) is who I am, that I am failing my family, that I am too weak to go another day in pain, that my life isn’t good because I can’t do things others my age can do, that my husband deserves someone who isn’t sick.
Those are all lies! The pity party life is not truth! I want to thank LGG group for this study. Today I am thankful for the Word of Truth and I choose to practice what It says. I can grow in wisdom, I can grow closer to God, and this Truth reminds me of Whose I am – I am a child of God and He died so that I could be saved! Hallelujah!
I was recently showed, by God, that I was believing lies but I couldn’t see it or stop it. God is directing me, with great love and patience, to know and understand HIS true love and full acceptance of me because of what Jesus has already done for me, on the cross. It’s a spiritual battle. Ask God to help you figure it out..he will. Freedom in Jesus is real! Jesus is everything we will ever need!!! Believe it but don’t get down if you have trouble, God is full of mercy and kindness, he adores us.
I stumbled on this article after trying to understand how to get past the lies I have believed for so long. I realize inside I hate myself & I feel too messed up for God to fix. I feel too selfish, too wounded from my past emotional abuse, and too lost to ever believe God’s love for me, deep inside. I find I have times of growth but the enemy comes at me and then I believe the lies again. So why try, why have hope. I just feel so broken. I want to know and feel God’s love, but I feel powerless to make that happen. I want to find healing but it seems when I do, it’s just torn down again. These comments have helped me know I am not alone and it seems there is hope.