Have you ever been in a situation or relationship that seemed hopeless? Maybe you’ve had someone in your life devise an evil plan to hurt you or those you love, and not even a ray of hope can be found in it?
Reading through Esther these past eight weeks and studying her marriage to King Xerxes, I would say the king lived his life detached from his wife, at best. Esther may have been an orphan girl turned queen, but her marriage to King Xerxes was no fairy tale.
He was a man who seemed to possibly have a drinking problem. Think back on how many events from our story center around banquets and wine.
He was a man who was easily angered, who reacted first and thought later.
We know he was not a good judge of character. He surrounded himself with unwise counsel, whether it was Haman or his board of advisors. Need an example? Think back at the advice his men gave him when dealing with Queen Vashti.
If that wasn’t enough, it appears Queen Esther’s marriage to King Xerxes had cooled, since the king had gone 30 days without requesting to see her. Think about that for just a moment. 30 days without having any sort of contact with your husband… a woman could begin to feel as though she was forgotten, not needed… unloved.
To top it all off, Esther then had to muster enough courage to be the one who approached her husband…to the point of risking her own life for her people, and at the encouragement of the only man who has truly loved her, her cousin and adopted father figure Mordecai.
I say all this just because my heart hurts for her.
As a woman.
As a wife.
She must have wondered at times if King Xerxes really was who she was supposed to be married to. Though her life looked glamorous from the outside, inside the palace walls it was far from a fairy tale.
You can almost sense the heartache Esther was feeling in chapter 8 as she falls to her husband’s feet, weeping and pleading with him to stop the evil plan – which, may I remind you, he and his buddy Haman, “devised against the Jews.”
In his defense, the king seems almost shocked at his wife’s response to him. From his perspective, he had given her everything she wanted. Haman was dead and his estate was given to her, which she, in turn, gave to Mordecai. What more did she want?
But that wasn’t enough.
Because he really didn’t understand what she was truly after.
This wasn’t really about her… but about THEM.
Her people.
The king didn’t seem to comprehend the threat of disaster that was looming over Esther and her people, even after Haman was dead. The evil edict was still in place, and something needed to be done about it. It’s as though the light bulb went off and King Xerxes finally saw the severity of the plan he and Haman put into action.
And then something happens: a ray of hope shines on the situation.
King Xerxes begins to understand the seriousness of the situation, and his heart turns toward his wife and her people.
What was once hopeless is no longer.
God is at work and deliverance is on the horizon.
Now instead of being divided on this issue, they are united.
Though the previous law cannot be stopped, King Xerxes gives Esther and Mordecai the power to write another edict, allowing the Jews to defend themselves on the day planned for their annihilation!
Have you ever been in a situation that seemed hopeless? If so, be encouraged today that God, in His timing, can change the situation. He brought hope and deliverance to Esther, Mordecai and all Jews living under King Xerxes’s reign! He did it then, and He can do it again!
What was once a hopeless situation can be changed to a hope filled situation when God works through His people!
Let’s Talk: Have you ever went through a situation in your life where you felt hopeless? If so, how did God work in your life to move you from hopeless to hope-filled?
Love God Greatly!
We are in a hopeless place, financially. I truly see no way out of the mess we’ve made over the years. I lose sleep… trying to calm my anxious spirit & turn it over to God. I began faithfully giving to our church weekly about 6 months ago and have steadily increased the amount as God clearly spoke to me. But years & years of giving nothing at all, and living a really fun life with no regard for the future has caught up with us. Now I’m panicked. It’s a big mess that burdens our marriage, and effects every single thing we do. So easy to see where we went wrong, but impossible to see how to fix it. My humble offering isn’t much, but I pray God finds it faithful now… not out of show, or even desperation. But out of desire to please Him & honor Him. I pray He will take our little, and make a way for more. Debt is scary, embarrassing & too heavy for me to carry around. But our choices come with consequence & that’s what we are feeling now.
Heather, you are so brave to share your story. The God of all hope will never leave you and your family. Keep seeking Him. He uses all things to write our story and draw us closer to Him. I am praying for you!
Heather, my husbands and my story sounds so similar to you. We too were not wise at all with our choices and money for years. We had a lot of debt, even debt that I was kept unaware of by my husband, A Lot. We went through a very difficult season because of it, my husband was even let go from a lucrative job because of dishonesty and we had to move from a new home that we worked hard at building, and from friends and family that we had very cherished relationships with. We had no choice but to move so my husband could work and it broke my heart so so much. But you know what here we are 3 1/2 years later and life is great. We have come to love where we live even more than where we used to live, and it has been the best thing for my kids. Our finances are back on track, we tithe faithfully, our debt is paid off and life is pretty darn good. God is so amazing and faithful to bring beauty from ashes, to forgive, restore, and change hearts and lives that are repentant and trusting in Him. So keep your chin up and grab hold of hope because I promise you God is faithful, He will NEVER leave you, and He will blow your mind on how He can redeem any situation.
I’m still in a place where I am waiting for God to redeem my marriage and my family.
My husband and I have been married for nearly 25 years and have 3 children.
It has been so hard. I’ve been emotionally shut out and endured Multiple jobs, moves, bankruptcy, and broken promises.
We’ve always gone to church together, but my husband’s faith has been tenuous at best. He wouldn’t lead in devotions or use daily childhood experiences to teach scripture or the love and redemptive power of Christ. I did it mostly alone for as long as I could.
Along the way. 2 of our children were diagnosed with atypical autism and all three have anxiety issues. My husband has severe anxiety and I’ve been diagnosed with depression.
I feel like my faith in God’s promises is the only thing that has kept me sane amidst the chaos of autism and the fights with my husband that have been a hallmark of our marriage.
Recent marriage counseling and personal therapy has brought some peace to our marriage. But that peace is mostly my choice not to argue or press the issues that are breaking my heart.
5 years ago he told me he was finally ready to come out and say he is bisexual. I believe him when he says he has never been unfaithful to me or had a sexual relationship with a man. But the revelation devastated me. When he proudly made his announcement he then was quick to support all options for sexual orientation. He then began his gradual slide out of faith and now does not really know if there is a God and doesn’t want to worship one that sends people to hell.
I understand his doubts and questions. I would not hesitate to say we’ve all faced similar questions or concerns.
Additionally, one of my two girls has said she is bisexual and the other that she is lesbian.
I’m ready to give up. I’ve prayed, studied, prayed more, screamed at God, and prayed some more.
It seems the more I need God to step up and move in my family the more he ignores my prayers and leaves my lonely, afraid, and often hopeless.
I know that Esther is supposed to be an example of God’s love and faithfulness to his people and to women who stay faithful to God in the midst of miserable circumstances.
Even as I know this, I’m still angry and afraid that God will not redeem my marriage, my family, or the hearts of my daughters. I’m desperately need a glimmer of hope.
Leigh, I am praying for you and your family and I will continue to do so, I have put your name on my list.
Oh Leigh, I prayed for you and your family. It broke my heart to hear your story. Without going into a lot of detail, my husband decided he wanted to be with someone else and left me. During that period when I was alone, one thing that helped with my anxiety and hopelessness was that I would go outside, put on my favorite Christian praise songs–volume high–sing and dance and praise God for loving me. During those times the anxious thought left and I felt peace and calm afterwards. I prayed for my husband and eventually my marriage was restored. I know God to be faithful and even when I don’t get the answers I’m looking for, I praise him and thank him for loving and caring for me. His peace comes to me when I praise Him. I will continue to pray for you. God’s peace and mercy to you.
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